Language Laughs
"So, you old so-and-so, you sow all day while your wife sits at home and sews!", said the so-cialite to the farmer.
to + to = too
It was the time of the World Chess Championship. Chess fans and professionals gathered in the large city, already decorated for the end of the year holiday season. After a reception for the contestants, some of the attendees filtered out into the hotel lobby. A few of the best of the players began to boast of their past wins -- how few moves it took to checkmate, how they had stared down their opponents to push them to hasty moves, and so forth.
The intensity of their claims of bravado in this what can be a complicated game of skill, strategy, tactic, and psychology, grew as the night went on. It soon drew the attention of the hotel manager. At first he stood at a distance, listening. Then he moved closer, making his presence known and showing disapproval on his face of all the commotion.
Finally, the hotel manager directly confronted the loudest of the participants and asked them to leave the lobby. When asked why, he simply stated, "I'll not have chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!"
Spoonerisms are worth a laugh.